Tuesday, May 15, 2012

50 Days of Holy! What Are You Thinking?

"What Are You Thinking?"
By Kathleen Benis

"We are assured and know that God, being a partner in their labor, all things work together and are [fitting into a plan] for good to and for those who love God and are called according to [His] design and purpose.”
Romans 8:28 Amplified Bible

Through my current study of Jennifer Rothchild's Me Myself and Lies, God is allowing the Holy Spirit to speak to my heart and be a “watchman at my thought closet door.”

Our family is walking out some real emotional issues as we trust God for Him to bring a baby to us through adoption. As mom, and soon to be grammy, I see my son and his wife preparing. My emotions run wild. Why doesn't she wait until the baby  is legally theirs before setting up the nursery? Will she be able to handle closing the nursery door, if this baby is not intended for her.

My daughter-in-love Michelle works hard everyday as a teacher. Nathan will be the primary caregiver of this sweet baby boy during her work day. Guess what that means? Grammy will have a big responsibility to this baby. But, I want to play with my husband, race around in his sports car with him. Have lunch with friends. Write blogs that encourage and uplift my gal pals. What if a baby cuts into all this?

The enemy steps into my “thought closet”.
"You should feel sorry for yourself."
"You deserve your freedom."
"You are all alone in these thoughts. If you share them you will only make yourself look selfish."
"You know God only made you to be a “need meter”, so put your “I make needy people” t-shirt on, and get busy."
"How bad will you feel when, after all your crying out, all your prayers, God doesn't even give you this baby?!"

Wow, I”m depressed. And, by this time, I bet even you are thinking, "Is she trying to help me feel better today? or worse!"

Feelings are powerful, but they don't always represent truth, and they are not a sin to have. It's what we do with our thoughts that make the difference. We must control what we say to our souls.

The best antidote to a mood like this is to adjust my feelings with the truth of God. I need to rehearse the truth in my mind: 
  • Jesus knows I love Him.
  • He will give me a set-right and put-together life.
  • Being a Grammy will be as God has promised in Ephesians 3:20, “More than I could ask or imagine”.
As I breath in God's promises, and watch the Holy Spirit guide me to scripture after scripture of truth, the heaviness of emotion lifts. Like a“balm”, a salve of tenderness soothes my down-cast heart. I see God equipping me. He begins to lift the burden and the fear. He allows me to see what a joy and privilege it is to have this great family. Instead of a surplus of emotion that causes me to act without wisdom, I am empowered to control my self-talk.

I choose to stand on Philippians 4:6,7:

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

~Kathleen has so generously opened her "thought closet" to us today. I wish I was sitting across the kitchen table from you this morning, hugging a cup of our fave brew, openly sharing  our thoughts and concerns. I wonder what you would tell me. I imagine ways in which I could encourage you and pray for God to alleviate your worries, your concerns, your fears. He has been so faithful to me, and yet, I still find myself going down the path of fear and negativity at times. I, too, am in need of encouragement and affirmation.
Whatever you are facing today, I can assure you of this: God is with you and He will never leave you. In the murkiest moments of my life, God was there. He proved Hiimself faithful. And, He took all the ugliness of my life and has made it beautiful!
I don't know what you are facing, but I am praying for you! If you would like to share specific requests or an unspoken request, we welcome you to leave a comment. (You don't need to fill in the "URL" section, just a name is all you need to submit it. Or post it on the Woven Women FB Page.) May you be blessed today with a clear mind and God-thoughts!
Much Love~~Cindy
Kathleen's husband Larry has given her 31years of happiness and now a beautiful home in Newark, Ohio, near their son Nathan and daughter-in-"love" Michelle.

Kathleen loves the Lord and loves sharing insights from God's Word. She loves to help others walk through the hard times, celebrate the good times and give hope in the messy-ness of life.
She is a Woven Woman: a Woman of Virtue!

1 comment:

  1. Very thoughtful and honest comments, dear sister. God's blessings on u for sharing.


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